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Kurt Cobain 1967-1994 Text of suicide note... To Boddah (Kurt's imaginary childhood friend.) Speaking from the tongue of ...Kurt Cobain 1967-1994
Text of suicide note...
To Boddah (Kurt's imaginary childhood friend.)
Speaking from the tongue of an experienced simpleton who obviously would rather be an emasculated, infantile complain-ee. This note should be pretty easy to understand.
All the warnings from the punk rock 101 courses over the years, since my first introduction to the, shall we say, ethics involved with independence and the embracement of your community has proven to be very true. I haven't felt the excitement of listening to as well as creating music along with reading and writing for too many years now. I feel guilty beyond words about these things. (Throughout the Kurt Cobain suicide note this is a recurring theme. Loss of pleasure in normally pleasurable events is a common and acute suicide risk factor.)
For example when we're back stage and the lights go out and the manic roar of the crowds begins., it doesn't affect me the way in which it did for Freddie Mercury, who seemed to love, relish in the love and adoration from the crowd which is something I totally admire and envy. The fact is, I can't fool you, any one of you. It simply isn't fair to you or me. The worst crime I can think of would be to rip people off by faking it and pretending as if I'm having 100% fun. Sometimes I feel as if I should have a punch-in time clock before I walk out on stage. I've tried everything within my power to appreciate it (and I do, God, believe me I do, but it's not enough). I appreciate the fact that I and we have affected and entertained a lot of people. It must be one of those narcissists who only appreciate things when they're gone.
I'm too sensitive. I need to be slightly numb in order to regain the enthusiasms I once had as a child.
On our last 3 tours, I've had a much better appreciation for all the people I've known personally, and as fans of our music, but I still can't get over the frustration, the guilt and empathy I have for everyone. There's good in all of us and I think I simply love people too much, so much that it makes me feel too fu*king sad. The sad little, sensitive, unappreciative, Pisces, Jesus man. Why don't you just enjoy it? I don't know!
(Another theme throughout the note is the sense of loss - again this is a very typical and serious predictor of bipolar suicide.)
I have a goddess of a wife who sweats ambition and empathy and a daughter who reminds me too much of what i used to be, full of love and joy, kissing every person she meets because everyone is good and will do her no harm. And that terrifies me to the point to where I can barely function. I can't stand the thought of Frances becoming the miserable, self-destructive, death rocker that I've become. (Also typical are feelings of fear and anticipated loss. Kurt's anxiety and agitation are palpable. What suicidal people want is not death but escape from pain, and Kurt was agonized with anticipatory concerns for his daughter.)
I have it good, very good, and I'm grateful, but since the age of seven, I've become hateful towards all humans in general. Only because it seems so easy for people to get along that have empathy. Only because I love and feel sorry for people too much I guess.
Thank you all from the pit of my burning, nauseous stomach for your letters and concern during the past years. I'm too much of an erratic, moody baby! .(Kurt was not taking a mood stabilizer such as lithium and thus had no protection from mood swings or chronic depressive despair. Self-medicating as Kurt did just made things worse, with substance abuse being yet another of the acute risk factors. I don't have the passion anymore, and so remember, it's better to burn out than to fade away.
Peace, love, empathy. Kurt Cobain
Frances and Courtney, I'll be at your alter.
Please keep going Courtney, for Frances.(This is the one place in the Kurt Cobain suicide note where there is any sign of a preventative factor. Having a child and concern for family is one of the known suicide inhibitors, but it seems Kurt is overwhelmed by the final risk factor - delusional guilt.)
For her life, which will be so much happier without me. I LOVE YOU
I LOVE YOU(more)(less)
by looptroop.. a swedish rap group! :D Edit: Jävlar jag trodde aldrig attjag skulle få så många viewes! Över 100 tusen st ...by looptroop.. a swedish rap group! :D
Edit:
Jävlar jag trodde aldrig attjag skulle få så många viewes! Över 100 tusen st! Eller klart, det e ju looptroop fan!(more)(less)
Well this video is sh*t I know but it's only done because I wanna get a hang if the technique in the real thing. I will ...Well this video is sh*t I know but it's only done because I wanna get a hang if the technique in the real thing. I will do a new movie soon with a proper piece.
the song is; prop dylan-we strive
you can download the song from http://www.whoa.nu/ but you have to be a member.
you can get the program that I paint in on http://www.vandalsquad.com/index.php?flash_x=127 and if you wanna see more from me visit http://pic2.piczo.com/MajsOne/?g=21953092&cr=2(more)(less)
This is unfinished Demo in 1h trainings :P. Sorry for bad quality(MP3 player recording). Nieukonczone Demo po godzinie ...This is unfinished Demo in 1h trainings :P. Sorry for bad quality(MP3 player recording).
Nieukonczone Demo po godzinie trenowania. Zla jakosc to wina nagrywania przez MP3, brak innego sprzetu :P.(more)(less)
Read description! It was made in boredom.. :P You know the funny clip when that kid falling down in water? in case not ...Read description!
It was made in boredom.. :P
You know the funny clip when that kid falling down in water? in case not: http://www.youtube.comhttp://www.sweetcrazyboy.com/v5/video.videos/v/FUj5BKMGIuk
First the real clip comes.. then i remixed it.
the remix is not so fun in the beginning. so pls watch the whole movie and subscribe me! :D(more)(less)
My friend Do Dung playing Vong Co acoustic guitar for a Cai Luong singer at an informal gathering of professional ... Do ...My friend Do Dung playing Vong Co acoustic guitar for a Cai Luong singer at an informal gathering of professional musicians in Ho Chi Minh City. Recorded May 5,2004- (sorry for low-light video). Mr Dung is a professional musician, writer and journalist with numerious awards to his credit.He can be reached at:
baosktp@hcm.vnn.vn(more)(less)
Nirvana's "Lithium" performed by me... Recorded by my 7 year old nephew! hahaha The video quality is pretty crappy, just ...Nirvana's "Lithium" performed by me... Recorded by my 7 year old nephew! hahaha The video quality is pretty crappy, just like the rest of my videos but the audio's good. Enjoy and feel free to critique... Thanx :)(more)(less)
